ABOUT THE SONGS
Please click on the song title to learn about the song objectives and suggested notes on what to discuss further with the children. There is also a section about the Most Asked Questions by the children who have watched this program
My Body Is My Body:
If It Don't feel Right
The "What If" Game
If You've Got A problem
Love Is Gentle
Program Songs & Objectives
Please click here to go to the song page with full details
My Body Is My Body
Song Objectives
1. To teach children that their body is their own and
no-one has the right to hurt them or touch their private parts. Be clear that the parts of their body covered by underwear are private.
2. You can explain to children that the only time parents may be touching their private parts is to bathe them (when they are young) or maybe to apply medicine if they are sick or sore.
3. A doctor may have to touch their private parts if they are sick (but Mommy or Daddy or someone from their family would always be there)
4. Grown Up's do not show love to children by touching their private parts
5. It is not a game when people try to touch your private parts. The most important thing is that it is ok to say NO when something or someone makes you feel uncomfortable or tries to hurt you.
Notes for teachers or parents: Most sexual abuse occurs either within the extended family or by someone the child knows and trusts. It is very damaging to a child when this trust is broken.Children need to know they have someone safe to go to for help and someone who will listen to them.
Children need to know if abuse occurs that :
a) They are not to blame
b) That they should not feel guilty
c) That the person that has abused them needs to get help for their problem so that they will stop hurting children -and that is why it is so important to tell !
Please remember that the perpetrator is usually someone that the child loves or trusts, so the subject needs to be discussed gently. You could explain that like a drug addict or an alcoholic,people that abuse children need help to get better so that they wont hurt children anymore.
Please click here to go to the song page with full details
The 'What If' Game
Song Objectives
To teach children to say NO with authority.
Suggestions
The 'What If' game can be applied to any situation that you may suspect is happening to a child. Use the game to give answers to difficult situations that they may not know how to get out of safely.
Examples.....
1. 'What If' someone knocks on the door and you are alone at home? What would you do?
a) Never open the door
b) Call a neighbour or relative if they won't go away
c) Call the police if you can't get any help and you are scared.
2. 'What If' a babysitter tries to touch your private parts.
a) Tell them NO then go and tell someone
Notes For Teachers Or Parents:
Explaining Strangers to children
If you ask a group of children what a Stranger is - you may get 20 different answers such as:
a) A stranger is a bad person
b) Someone that will hurt you
c) Someone that gives you sweets
Children have many misconceptions as to what "Strangers" are.
We teach our children:"Dont talk to strangers"
"Don't get in a care with a stranger"
"Don't take sweets from a stranger"
But....we often forget to tell them what a stranger is.
So firstly we need to teach children What Is A Stranger ?
A Stranger is someone we don't know !
A Stranger can be:
A Man or a Lady, someone old or young
Someone of any colour or social group
Not all strangers are bad people, and if someone that you love or trust introduces you to a stranger - that stranger can become a friend.
BUT....unless someone you love and trust introduces you to a stranger you should never talk to them on your own.
Give children of some examples of what lies strangers may try and tell them for example
a) Your Mom asked me to pick you up from school as she is running late
b) I have lost my puppy, please could you come and help me look for it
c) I want to show you something really exciting, I promise I will bring you right back
d) Never accept gifts from a stranger, no matter how nice they are or how nice the gift is
Please click here to go to the song page with full details
Love Is Gentle
Song Objectives
To teach children that love is gentle and kind and is all about caring and trusting.
You might ask the children to draw a picture of something that they like to do with the people that they love.
Children come from many different types of families and backgrounds but the rules of love should all be the same.
Children should be loved gently
Cared For and looked after
Have food to eat
Clean clothes
Someone to make sure their teeth are clean
Their hair is brushed
Someone is there to help with problems
Please click here to go to the song page with full details
If It Don't Feel Right
Song Objectives
1. To teach children to listen to their own feelings.
Most of the time children know when things do not feel right or when things make them feel uncomfortable so teach them this rule -
"If it don't feel right - don't do it !"
2. You can talk to them about all sorts of scenarios like peer pressure from their friends at school - trying to make them do things they know are not right you can even include drugs in this conversation-
"If it don't feel right - don't do it !"
3. You can talk about strangers (one thing I learned when working with little ones is that some of them do not know what a stranger is - so explain to them a stranger is and
If a strangers tries to get you to go with them
"If it don't feel right - don't do it !"
4. Children need to know that their bodies are their own and that if things make them feel uncomfortable that they have the right to say No I don't want to do that-
"If it don't feel right - don't do it !"
Notes for teachers or parents:
The most important thing with talking about abuse to children - is to make it non-threatening and to make it memorable and if at all possible fun.
The main thought behind this program is that children remember songs and they are far more likely to remember these rules by remembering the songs and if the songs are fun - they are good, positive memories.
Have discussions and let children share their stories
of peer pressure and how they dealt with it - and have suggestions on what else they could have done.
Please click here to go to the song page with full details
If You've Got A Problem
Song Objectives
1. To reinforce the learning of telling someone if there is a problem and if they don't listen keep telling till someone does listen to you.
2. It also gives children a list of people to tell
Mom
Dad
Gran
Older Brother
Older Sister
Grandpa
Aunt
Uncle
Teacher
Principal
Minister
Policeman
Neighbour
Notes For Teachers Or Parents:
Telling somebody about problems can be one the hardest things to do for children as it might be difficult for them to try to explain what their problem is, and they may also be afraid how you might react.
When we talk to children about telling someone, we need to prepare them for what reactions to expect:
a) Grown ups may be offended, angry, shocked or scared
b) They may not believe the child
c) They may threaten the child not to tell anyone else
The main lesson to get through to the child, is that if someone does not believe them or does nothing about the problem to Tell Someone Else and keep telling until someone listens to you !!
Feelings:
It is important that children know about how they might feel when telling about a problem - these points might help them
a) You might feel embarrassed - but it is OK
b) You might find it hard to find the right words, but just explain the best way you can
c) Your heart might beat fast and your voice might shake - but just take a deep breath and talk slowly
d) You might find it easier to tell a little at a time over a few days
e) You might find it easier to write down your problem and give it to someone
f) You might feel angry
Tell them to find the best way that they feel comfortable to tell someone.
Most Asked Questions
Whilst travelling around schools - these were the most asked questions by the children - and some suggested answers:
Question: Why Do People Hurt Kids?
There are several reasons why people hurt children, some people were abused as children themselves and carry on the cycle of hurting others. Some people have drink ,drug or anger problems. The main thing to remember is that it is wrong to hurt children so that is why you always need to tell someone, so you can get help.
Question: Why Do People Touch Kids Private Parts?
Again there are many reasons why people sexually abuse children, again many were abused themselves. Again it is important to tell as these people need help and treatment so they can get better and not hurt children anymore.
Whilst travelling around schools - these were the most asked questions by the children - and some suggested answers:
Question: What do I do if nobody believes me?
If you tell someone and they don't believe you - then tell someone else and keep telling people till someone believes you
Question: If I do tell, what will happen?
They will have to report that you are being hurt.
Someone will then come and talk to your family
They will see if it is safe for you to stay at home or if you need to go somewhere else where they can keep you safe while the person that is abusing you gets help.
Question: What do I do if I say NO and they don't stop?
If they don't stop when you say no - you can shout loud if someone is there that can help you or you know there are people around that will hear you shout and come and help you.
If nobody is there then to and tell someone as soon as it is safe to do so.
Question: What do I do if they tell me that they will hurt me or someone in my family if I tell?
People that abuse children do not want other people to know what they are doing so they may try and threaten you or someone in your family. You need to be brave and tell about your problem.
Question: What do I do if it is my brother or sister that is abusing me?
Tell your parents and if they do not listen to you tell someone at school or from the list of people we have discussed.
Question: Will they be angry If I Tell?
Yes they may be angry, but you still need to be brave and tell so that they will stop hurting you or touching your private parts and they can get help for their problem.